One of the great things about practice is that over time, you start seeing things more clearly. At first for me this was great, I noticed I was growing the skill to see through the emotional layer of other peoples comments, to the truth of what they were saying. When I found myself in arguments I noticed that sometimes I still got sucked up emotionally, but I had a new ability to pull out and get perspective and clearly see where they were hurting and what they were asking for.
So that’s great.
Unfortunately, with outward clear seeing also comes inward clear seeing – and one day I realized that I was clearly seeing my anxiety and fear in a much different way. I realized that I had been existing for quite a while in a bit of a soup of fear and anxiety – low grade and pervasive. As if there was always something that was making me uneasy or fearful.
the Good Heretic 